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  • #411 The meaning is in the moment

    The meaning of your life is not in the goals you crave.
    It’s not in the results you chase.
    Nor is it in the habits you create.

    The meaning is in what you do in this very moment.
    And the next moment.
    And the one after that.

    The meaning is in your collection of actions. In your collection of decisions. In your collection of present moments. Wherever they take you.

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    #29 The myth of self-sabotage

    All behavior is inspired by avoiding pain or gaining pleasure – and since you usually act on what your brain perceives as the most intense of the two.

    So if you think you desire something, but then “sabotage” yourself so you never get what you desire, that means you have mixed feelings about desire (and thus inner conflict): deep down, you feel that desire will give you more pain than pleasure.

    In other words, it’s not self-sabotage: it’s your brain protecting you from pain it perceives as stronger than the pleasure you might get from reaching your goal.

    Maybe you desire more money, but deep down, you feel money will corrupt you, or make you lose friends, make you feel guilty, or make you lose your drive.

    Maybe you have a desire to write or create, but you feel the pain of judgment or rejection is stronger than the pleasure of creating.

    Maybe you want to get in shape, but deep down, you feel you’ll give up anyway before reaching any meaningful results, so you’d rather save yourself the pain of future disappointment (a classic self-trust problem).

    Maybe you notice a certain destructive pattern in your relationships, but you believe going to therapy and “opening up that can of worms” will be even worse than perpetuating the current situation.

    If you keep sabotaging yourself, it might be worth to ask yourself the question: what pain am I avoiding? What am I afraid of? In my imagination, what’s going to happen when I reach my goal; both positive AND negative?

    Or even better than just asking: journal about it.

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    #243 Mending the Misunderstanding

    We all live in a maze of mistranslations and misunderstandings about who we think you are and who others think we are.

    Now, by lack of a way to know who we truly are, misunderstandings can be comforting, my friend; there’s no doubt about that.

    But when you get so lost in the maze that it causes suffering, it might be time to start mending the misunderstandings.

    Could it be that mending is nothing more than making another mistranslation about who we are that makes us happier?

    After all, I can perceive myself as a struggling writer or a skilled wordsmith – both perspectives hold their truths.

    It’s the power of our misunderstandings that molds our reality.

  • #307 Why wait for the pain when you can write today?

    You can wait to start writing until that moment when the frustration builds up so much that not writing becomes unbearable.

    But why wait for the pain if you could just write today?

    After all, you’re not waiting to become a writer. You’re already a writer. You’re just not writing. Yet.

    And all of that can change in one moment of deciding not to wait, but to write.

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