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  • #323 It’s about the way you say…

    It’s about the way you say, “I’m tired, and I’m here anyway.”

    It’s about the way you say, “I’m exhausted, I’m skipping this one, and that’s okay, because I’ll be back on track the next day.”

    It’s about the way you say, “Come what may, I’m in this, and from my chosen path, I won’t be led astray.”

    It’s about intentionality and elastic discipline.

    It’s about direction.

    Most of all, it’s about feeling good, not guilty.

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    #73 Why am I rushing?

    Journaling question of the day: Why am I rushing?

    Out of habit and automaticity – mindlessness caused by endless repetition?

    Out of discomfort – I want to get out of this situation as soon as possible?

    Out of impatience – I expect whatever comes next to be more interesting or riveting?

    What would happen if I don’t rush this?

    By interrupting the automaticity and slowing down, will I reopen my senses and discover new nuances?

    By not rushing away from discomfort, will I discover everything is not as bad as I feared it would be?

    By resisting impatience, can I become fascinated with whatever is happening right here, right now?

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    #294 The true purpose of goals

    Goals make you write every day and enjoy the process, even if you’ll never publish a book.

    Goals make you practice yoga and get to know your body, even if you’ll never be able to be in that ultimate pose.

    Goals makes you help someone and learn to give and contribute, even if your help ultimately doesn’t get them to the place they wanted to go.

    Goals don’t predict outcomes. Because the purpose of a goal is not to achieve it, but to set the direction of your life.

    It gives you the fuel to start taking action, and the guidance to make sure that action is intentional.

    I don’t know about you, my friend, but to me, that’s a fulfilling thought.

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    #24 Put your actions where your mouth is

    Here’s a useful insight from James Clear, author of Atomic Habits:

    Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.

    https://jamesclear.com/3-2-1/june-4-2020

    Writing every day reaffirms my “I’m a writer” identity.

    Sitting on the couch every day reaffirms my “I’m a couch potato” identity.

    As a consequence: when you change your actions and your identity starts shifting to align with those actions.

    And that’s how we get out of a rut.

    (The opposite isn’t always true: changing your thoughts without changing your actions will rarely shift your identity. I can think of being a writer as much as I want, if I never put any words on paper, I’m not a writer. That’s one of the principle of cognitive dissonance: Actions overrule Thoughts.)

    Here’s how to change your actions and your identity:

    1. First, you decide who you want to be (and what your new identity looks like).
      “I want to be a yogi: someone who regularly practices yoga and takes care of his mind and body.”
    2. Second you get clear on what that would look like in your daily life: which actions you’ll take that are different from the ones you’re taking right now.
      “Instead of watching TV before, my “yogi identity” would do a daily yoga session.
    3. Third, you gain enough leverage over yourself to go against your current habits, and take those different action for a prolonged period of time.
      This is where most resistance comes up, because my old “couch potato identity” is fighting my “yogi” identity — and through my past actions, the couch potato has received WAY more votes than the yogi.
      So you need perseverance at this stage. Remember, every time you take those new actions, you’re voting for your new identity and new habits are taking roots.
    4. At some point, you reach a tipping point productivity experts call “habit escape velocity“: you now have so much momentum that you’re out of the sphere of influence of your old habits, and your new habits (and new identity) can take root.

    Which begs the question…

    Where are you saying you want to be a certain way, but you’re voting for something else through your daily actions?

    Lukas Van Vyve

    Put your money (or your actions) where your mouth is.

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