#412 Your best bet is showing up today

Wanting to improve certain areas in your life is powerful.

But that improvement gap comes with a pressure trap.

Because if you believe you’re in control of your actions, the moments you accidentally fall back into old patterns become extra frustrating.

When your self-worth becomes attached to your behavior, every action becomes a judgment of character.

And so the pressure mounts.

Missing one workout means you’re not worthy of running a marathon.

Missing one day of writing means you’ll never be a writer.

Making one communication mistake, making someone angry, means you’re a terrible person.

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To make that pressure bearable, build self-trust (for example, through Tiny Trust Builders).

Trust that you can run a marathon, even if you miss a workout.

Trust that you can be a writer, even if you miss one day of writing.

Trust that you can be a good person, even if you’ve made mistakes or upset some people.

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Notice the improvement gap between where you are and where you want to go.

Let the majority of your actions be a vote for the person you want to be.

Focus on elastic discipline, not hardliner habits.

Do all that, and you’ll feel more fulfilled and free.

Who are you trying to convince here?

Is it others, who hold their own perspectives and judgments?

Or is it yourself, wrestling with self-doubt and seeking reassurance?

The only approval you need is your own.

If you know the journey of writing a book is filled with days where you won’t feel like writing, days where you won’t feel like writing aren’t a distraction – they’re a sign you’re on the right path.

After all, if you know setbacks are what makes your journey your journey, how could your journey be disturbed by setbacks?

You can be an aspiring writer without writing.

You can be a former writer without writing.

But you can only call yourself a writer today when you have proof that you’re currently writing.