It’s not just about wanting to be good at writing.
It’s about believing you’re a consistent writer.
And consistent writers write consistently…
And people who write consistently eventually become good at writing.
When you choose the right identity, everything falls into place.
The limiting thought is not, “I can’t write.”’
It’s not, “I always give up.”
It’s not, “I don’t have time.”
The limiting thought is, “What if, despite all my own naysaying, I DO follow through? Can I take the fact that it’ll disrupt my entire narrative and self-image?”
Following rules just because they’re rules is silly.
Breaking rules just because you like breaking rules is equally silly.
In a podcast segment about practicing Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu,Tim Ferris and Joshua Waitzkin discuss a principle for managing expectations they call:
“The first rep doesn’t count.”
Tim Ferris, Josh Waitzkin: https://tim.blog/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/148-josh-waitzkin.pdf
In other words: when performing a move for the first time, your body and mind need to get used to it. Gradually,you’ll get better – and the more aware you are of your body, the faster you’ll make progress – but judging someone on their first attempt doesn’t say much about their future potential.
This holds true for many skills in life, like starting a daily publishing habit.
Publishing a post or a video for the first time always feels funny (and often frightening). At this stage, judgment or feedback is futile. It’s all about jumping the hurdle of getting started
Publish five times, you’re ready to get some feedback (both from yourself and from others)…
Publish for the fiftieth time, and you’re well on your way to turn it into a habit… and fly.
So whenever I start something new, I manage my expectations by repeating to myself:
The first time feels funny. The fiftieth time I fly.
And for bonus points: What would it feel like the 500th time?
feigned feelings lead to forced forging
of a bond, brittle, easily brokenbut when i learn to listen
to the winds whirling within
stop seeing them as a sinwhen i hold them back no more
forceful feelings finally roar
revealing a hidden song
sung secretly for so longmy true self set free
softly I breathe
my melody into your mind
feelings mingle, sometimes grind
leaving the shyness far behindand hearing our songs entwined
I am no longer blind
to the insight
that we’ve been singing the same song
of a wordless world where we all belongat last I feel strong
Lukas Van Vyve
for we were always one
blessed by a bond
that can’t be undone
The normal want to be special
The special want to be normal
We all want to be what we aren’t
Because if you already are
How can you ever desire?
In working-class cafés in Napoli, people who experienced good luck often buy a coffee, then another one “pending”, which the barista can serve to anyone at his own discretion: a caffè sospeso.
A symbol of social trust and solidarity. Or, in the hands of marketeers and big coffee chains, a tool for increasing sales.
Regardless, it’s an act minimal enough to not to turn the donor into a hero, and small enough not to affect the receiver’s self-worth.
If such accessible acts of generosity make the donor feel good, and the receiver of a free coffee too…
And if it’s something almost everyone can do, not just billionaire philanthropists…
It’s an initiative worth spreading. Maybe not only for coffee.
