If you wouldn’t see overwhelming results in your first 30 days of writing, working out, dieting, or learning an instrument, would you still show up?
Are you okay with small, almost invisible gains because the process of learning, creating, practicing is fulfilling enough in itself?
And if not, could you be okay with that, if you knew it was the key to learning or creating anything you ever wanted?
Victory passes.
So does defeat.
Exhaustion passes.
So does excitement.
And because it all passes, the highest peaks and lowest lows are probably not your most reliable guides to make life decisions.
Take a step back.
Wait until the emotions pass and you see clearly again.
Then you can make choices that stand the test of time.
When it comes to habits, our actions in the present make future present moments more (or less) likely.
Do I journal today? That’s a vote for my journaling identity – which increases the likelihood of another journaling moment tomorrow. Predictive power.
Do I check Instagram today? That’s a vote for my Instagram-browsing identity – which increases the likelihood of another Instagram moment tomorrow. Predictive power.
Have I journaled 700 days in a row? I can say quite confidently I’ll journal again tomorrow. Massive predictive power.
So how do change the future?
Weaken the predictive power of one habit – stop taking the actions you want to change.
Strengthen the predictive power of a new habit – intentionally start taking different actions, and let every present moment be a vote for that new habit (and new identity).
The process is challenging and slow.
You’ll need patience.
Willpower to resist the pull of habits that have already accumulated tremendous predictive power.
You’ll need presence of mind and perseverance to choose new actions because you know they’re important to you.
It’s challenging. Slow. And worth it.
Because this is how you make the future yours.
Only when you know you can get through the bad moments, you can fully appreciate the good moments without fear of them
fading away.
Only when the fear of failure disappears, you can fully succeed.
Good or bad, you’ll be fine either way. That belief is all you need.
Here’s a useful insight from James Clear, author of Atomic Habits:
Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.
https://jamesclear.com/3-2-1/june-4-2020
Writing every day reaffirms my “I’m a writer” identity.
Sitting on the couch every day reaffirms my “I’m a couch potato” identity.
As a consequence: when you change your actions and your identity starts shifting to align with those actions.
And that’s how we get out of a rut.
(The opposite isn’t always true: changing your thoughts without changing your actions will rarely shift your identity. I can think of being a writer as much as I want, if I never put any words on paper, I’m not a writer. That’s one of the principle of cognitive dissonance: Actions overrule Thoughts.)
Here’s how to change your actions and your identity:
Which begs the question…
Where are you saying you want to be a certain way, but you’re voting for something else through your daily actions?
Lukas Van Vyve
Put your money (or your actions) where your mouth is.
You only need to stick to one new habit to prove to yourself that you can change.
One habit. One small activity. One Teeny Tiny Trust Builder where you don’t give up, but stay on track.
Why would you make this hard on yourself?
Write one sentence a day.
Learn one word a day.
Meditate for 1 minute.
Make it ridiculously small if you want.
But stick with it.
Stick with it on day one. And the next day. And the next. And also on the day when the universe seems to conspire against you.
Stick with it, because that one silly little activity can be the start of a changed life.
Maybe you feel like you’re going off-track once in a while.
Maybe going off-track is how you build your own track.
Maybe your own track doesn’t always have to go straight.
Maybe you’re the only one using your track.
And maybe that’s fine.
