When you do what you love, there are no more excuses that “you’d rather be doing something else.”
Which means there are no more excuses not to give it your best.
Being away from your that shelter of excuses can be scary. Or liberating. The choice is yours.
I could decide that writing less than 1000 words a day would be a failure – and I would be correct.
I could decide that writing more than 50 words a day would be a failure – and I would be correct.
I could decide that not writing today would be failure – and I would be correct.
After all, for many things in life, you get to decide yourself what’s failure and what’s success.
In fact, my friend, just like me you may have already decided for yourself what’s failure and what’s success.
And just like me, you may need a reminder of that decision once in a while, so you can verify if it still serves you.
This is that reminder.
Which serves me well, because my decision was that writing you this short daily letter is exactly right.
See you tomorrow.
One of the most potent drivers of change AND perpetuators of old habits is cognitive dissonance:
In the field of psychology, cognitive dissonance is the perception of contradictory information, and the mental toll of it. Relevant items of information include a person’s actions, feelings, ideas, beliefs, values, and things in the environment. Cognitive dissonance is typically experienced as psychological stress when persons participate in an action that goes against one or more of those things.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance
What’s interesting about cognitive dissonance is that both “sides” of the dissonance are not equal:
If you think one thing, but you do something else, eventually you’ll start believing what you do, not what you think.
In other words: actions overrule thoughts.
We usually start in the first scenario until we gain enough leverage over ourselves to change our actions. The moment we change our actions to actions that conflict with our thoughts/beliefs, we’re creating cognitive dissonance.
Then, if we follow through with our new actions, our beliefs start to change.
The big turning point is that moment where you start taking a different action.
Which begs the question:
Identify your leverage points that jolt you into action, and you gain power over your beliefs and identity.
You want to get the guitar piece exactly right but still trip up once in a while. How do you react?
You want to run a marathon but can’t even finish half a marathon yet. How do you react?
You want to explain how you feel but end up feeling misunderstood. How do you react?
Do you let frustration hold you back?
Or do you use the gap as leverage to change your actions and bridge the gap between your current and desired identity?
You can choose what success in your life looks like.
And if you make your daily successes achievable enough so you feel successful every day, guess what: you’re a successful person now.
There’s a reason it’s called Tiny Trust Builders, not massive out-of-reach Trust Builders.
So celebrate that one-minute workout you did.
That one sentence you wrote today.
That one new word you learned in a new language.
That one time you didn’t give in to cravings.
Because daily Tiny Trust Builders create massive momentum and massive self-trust.
And I don’t know about you, my friend, but I’d rather feel successful every day than like a failure because those good feelings will carry over in all other aspirations and relationships.
Whenever someone commits to doing something and doesn’t follow through, I start distrusting them.
Whenever I commit to doing something and don’t follow through, I start distrusting myself.
The person who most often lets you down might well be you.
If you don’t accept this behavior from others, why would you accept it from yourself?
The path to higher self-esteem is paved with kept promises to yourself.
You may win, lose, fly high, fall low
You may have it easy or hard
But come what may
There is no way you won’t grow.
