#227 Could a changed past set me free?

ByLukas
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Which conclusions did I draw from past experiences?

Have I overreacted to petty events, and ignored beautiful moments?

Have I deleted memories? Maybe invented some?

Have I built stories based on generalizations?

Most importantly: how does the past I still feel affect my actions today?

And if I know a lot of it was my own interpretation… could I change my past, or at least what it means to me?

Would that set me free?

I was undoubtedly in a pensive mood when writing this.

I guess, given the daily letters I send you, you might conclude I’m in a pensive mood every day.

And you wouldn’t be wrong.

But pensive moods can be useful – when they’re coupled with conclusions and insights. Maybe even with Tiny Trust Builders.

And if any of these questions help you re-interpret your past and set you free, too, I’ll be a happy man.

A wistful win-win.

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    #123 Never again

    ByLukas

    What gets you going – and what keeps you going?

    Pain. Pleasure. Usually, a combination of both.

    I like being disciplined – it gives me pleasure.

    I also know very well that I don’t want to go back to jumping from one project to another, giving up before reaching any meaningful level of skill or results, and ending up frustrated with myself – the thought alone is painful.

    The pain often gets you going, later to be joined by pleasure in a cocktail of motivation, discipline, and persistence.

    And in this case, strong emotions, passion, and yes, also pain, often lead to more leverage – if you allow yourself to see the lessons it can teach you.

    I never want to be that person again – which helped me figure out that I really want to be this person.

    Living your never again might well help you figure out your yes, for as long as I shall live.

  • | | |

    #59 Entity Mindset vs Incremental Mindset

    ByLukas

    Do you believe you’re good at something solely because of talent, invalidating all the work you’re putting in?

    Or do you believe you can change the course of your life, and let your daily actions shape who you are?

    The American psychologist and author of the book “Mindset” Carol Dweck describes how the way you think about your abilities can make or break your success in life:

    • Entity (fixed) mindset: “I’m good at languages, I’m bad at math”
    • Incremental (growth) mindset: “I worked hard on this, I’m learning, I’m discovering how to do this”

    An entity mindset makes you run into a wall

    When things get tough, people with an entity mindset often give up, because they don’t truly believe they can get much better.

    After all,I if you believe it’s all about innate ability, then why make any effort to develop strengths or weaknesses?

    An entity mindset also leads to fear of failure and perfectionism. If you’re believed to have an innate, fixed talent that’s set in stone, you’ll constantly need to live up to an unreasonably high standard for that particular talent.

    An incremental mindset makes you thrive

    People with an incremental mindset, on the other hand, thrive in tough situations: they know that through perseverance and a focus on daily practice and perseverance they can develop their skills and talents.

    Even if predisposition plays an important role, switching to an incremental mindset will always make you feel better about yourself and your daily actions.

    And while education and childhood experiences have a large impact on your mindset – you can always change your mind – by changing your actions.

  • #392 Why it’s fine to go slow and steady

    ByLukas

    It’s fine to go slow and steady until you’re ready to go faster.

    And even when you’re ready to go faster, it’s still fine to go slow and steady.

    Slow and steady, so you have the space to listen to the sounds.

    Slow and steady, so you have time to look around.

    Slow and steady, so you don’t burn out.

    Slow and steady, so you enjoy the journey.

    Slow and steady.

    Always moving.

    Always in flow.

    Always ready.

    When you go slow and steady.

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