#218 The United States of “If I wanted, I could”

ByLukas
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The path toward self-awareness isn’t always pleasant. 

Take yesterday, when I realized that in many cases, I’m more interested in the comfort of “wanting” something I don’t have than in “taking action to get something.”

That unappealing realization triggered a cascade of even more unappealing questions.

Would I rather mess around with small blog posts instead of becoming a skilled writer crafting coherent arguments?

Would I rather learn about a million different strategies to grow a newsletter instead of actually spreading the word and getting more people to read my newsletter?

Would I rather learn how to learn a language than actually learn a new language?

Is the frustration of unrealized potential also a huge source of comfort in my life?

I’m not sure if I should be happy with that realization. 

Maybe realizations aren’t even supposed to make me happy.

But even if they were, it doesn’t matter. 

Because look: here I am, writing another insight about it.

Another Tiny Trust Builder, proving that every day, I am one step closer to renouncing my citizenship of the United States of “If I wanted, I could.”

Another reminder to myself and you, my friend, one I’ll repeat until the bitter end: actions overrule thoughts.

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    #220 A reminder to decide

    ByLukas

    I could decide that writing less than 1000 words a day would be a failure – and I would be correct.

    I could decide that writing more than 50 words a day would be a failure – and I would be correct.

    I could decide that not writing today would be failure – and I would be correct.

    After all, for many things in life, you get to decide yourself what’s failure and what’s success.

    In fact, my friend, just like me you may have already decided for yourself what’s failure and what’s success.

    And just like me, you may need a reminder of that decision once in a while, so you can verify if it still serves you.

    This is that reminder.

    Which serves me well, because my decision was that writing you this short daily letter is exactly right.

    See you tomorrow.

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    #173 Are errors truly errors?

    ByLukas

    I can believe I’ve published the perfect insight – until I narrate the podcast version a couple of weeks later and suddenly notice subtle typos and, sometimes, logical flaws. The typos and flaws were always there – but did I make a mistake earlier? 

    I can believe I’ve nailed this yoga pose – until, during one session, I suddenly sense some tension in my neck I had never noticed before. The tension was always there – did I make a mistake earlier? 

    I can believe I’ve cooked the perfect dish – until one day, I notice that the sauce tastes even better with a little less salt. But, even before I noticed it, the improvement was always there – did I make a mistake earlier?

    Maybe learning is not about errors but about gaining ever more subtle awareness.

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    #227 Could a changed past set me free?

    ByLukas

    Which conclusions did I draw from past experiences?

    Have I overreacted to petty events, and ignored beautiful moments?

    Have I deleted memories? Maybe invented some?

    Have I built stories based on generalizations?

    Most importantly: how does the past I still feel affect my actions today?

    And if I know a lot of it was my own interpretation… could I change my past, or at least what it means to me?

    Would that set me free?

    I was undoubtedly in a pensive mood when writing this.

    I guess, given the daily letters I send you, you might conclude I’m in a pensive mood every day.

    And you wouldn’t be wrong.

    But pensive moods can be useful – when they’re coupled with conclusions and insights. Maybe even with Tiny Trust Builders.

    And if any of these questions help you re-interpret your past and set you free, too, I’ll be a happy man.

    A wistful win-win.

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