#143 Tipping the scale

ByLukas
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A voice in my head says I can’t write every day?

I’ll write 2 sentences every day, just to prove to that voice that I, in fact, CAN write every day.

A voice in my head says I don’t have the perseverance to train for (and then finish) a marathon?

I’ll do something small to prepare for the marathon every day, so at the end of each day, I can say to myself “The proof is there, today was another day of me persevering and preparing for a marathon.”

You can’t brute-force your way out of an “I can’t do this” belief. You can only take small actions that start proving the contrary.

Slowly but surely, you chip away at the credibility of the naysayer voice, until the scale starts tipping over, and an encouraging voice emerges.

Tiny trust builders.

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    #11 fixing a flawed faux finish

    ByLukas

    when the cracks in my faux finish
    finally appear
    my mind screams out
    you’re coming too near

    yet i resist the need to hide
    lean in to the fear
    let the cracks grow wide
    because after all these years
    slowly steadily submerged under layers of snow
    frozen frightened i don’t know where else to go

    i feel i’m sliding back into my head
    but you don’t let me
    instead
    you keep me here
    make even more light appear
    look at the fear
    until the icy flawed frozen faux finish finally fully melts away
    into a trembling torrent of tears

    and through the sobs
    subtle shining light teardrops
    mix mingle mend my mind
    my heart my soul a warmth so kind

    you guide my gaze and through the tears
    in my eyes a rainbow appears
    eclipsing the fear
    making it clear
    that when I dare to feel complete
    allow your heart and mine to meet

    i finally remember
    that I’m enough
    i’ve always been

    and at last
    i can be seen

    Lukas Van Vyve

  • #67 Caffè sospeso

    ByLukas

    In working-class cafés in Napoli, people who experienced good luck often buy a coffee, then another one “pending”, which the barista can serve to anyone at his own discretion: a caffè sospeso.

    A symbol of social trust and solidarity. Or, in the hands of marketeers and big coffee chains, a tool for increasing sales.

    Regardless, it’s an act minimal enough to not to turn the donor into a hero, and small enough not to affect the receiver’s self-worth.

    If such accessible acts of generosity make the donor feel good, and the receiver of a free coffee too…

    And if it’s something almost everyone can do, not just billionaire philanthropists…

    It’s an initiative worth spreading. Maybe not only for coffee.

  • |

    #97 Not loneliness. Solitude.

    ByLukas

    All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone

    Blaise Pascal, https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/19682-all-of-humanity-s-problems-stem-from-man-s-inability-to-sit

    We often equate sitting quietly in a room alone with loneliness: a word with a negative emotional charge.

    But sitting quietly in a room can also bring solitude: the simple state of being by yourself, without any negative connotation.

    Solitude can give relief of the pressure to be constantly “socializing” (through social media apps or in real life).

    Relief of the pressure to socialize can make space.

    Space you can use to hear the thoughts in your head and the feelings in your body.

    Thoughts and feelings that can tell you what’s truly important to you.

    And then you realize that what’s truly important to you is nothing new.

    It’s something you already knew, before you learned not to listen.

  • #439 Resolve can bring you far

    ByLukas

    I can’t predict what will happen tomorrow – or even today.

    But I do know that today, I resolve to write.

    And tomorrow I resolve to write once again.

    And that resolve has brought me to 439 consecutive days of writing.

    439 days of writing, despite living in an unpredictable world.

    439 days of realizing most obstacles are excuses.

    439 days of proving that resolve can bring you pretty far.

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    #89 Don’t get it backwards

    ByLukas

    I’m not writing because I can’t write?
    I’m not playing the guitar because I’m bad at music?
    I’m not learning a language because I’m bad at learning languages?

    That’s the world on its head.

    The truth is: you can’t write because you’re not writing.
    You can’t play the guitar because you’re not playing the guitar.
    You can’t speak the language because you’re not learning the language.

    If you would write every day, cognitive dissonance starts doing its work. Your actions will overrule your thoughts and beliefs.

    And every day you write, you’re becoming a writer.

    Every day you play the guitar, you’re becoming a guitar player.

    Every day you learn a language, you’re becoming a language learner.

    The only reason you can’t do it because you’re not doing it.

    Don’t get it backwards.

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